PACIFY

                                              PACIFY

And all this time cannot erase
The look of terror on my face
      The chills I get
       I can't forget
Our life was nothing but disgrace

And when I've had enough of lies
My darkest memories arise
      My deepest fears
      From years of tears
Will lead me to my own demise

(chorus)   No remorse
                Of corse
                I pacify my mind
                With wine and time....
                Don't ask why
                Don't justify
                I block it out, no doubt
                Dont shout

I medicate till its a blur
Clouded mind and voices slur
        Its all surreal
        I cannot feel
Theres not much more I can endure

The mask of sorrow falls away
I'll wear it on another day
        Just for now
        Don't ask how
I'll try to keep the world at bay

(repeat chorus)    

                                                                         Pam Stevens

HOOCHIE'S RAP

                             HOOCHIE'S   RAP

Yeah, my name is Hooch
And I live in the hood
Some don't like me
But some think I'm good
I got jaws of steel and paws to match
And you'll know how good I am
When you hear me rap     (turntable scratch-chh-chh-chh-chh-chh)

Yeah,I'm part pit
So I get a bad rap
I got a bad reputation
But I know where it's at
And I'm the proudest big dog across the nation
I can jump 5 feet cuz I'm part dalmation     (turntable scratch-chh-chh-chh-chh-chh)

I got a big head
and the longest tongue
I know you'd be upset
When you've seen what I've done
But I'm loyal
If your in my crew
You know I got your back and I WILL protect you     (turntable  scratch-chh-chh-chh-chh-chh)

Yeah, my name is Hooch
And I'm sniffin around
I can pick up your scent
In any town
And I can rap
And I'll prove it to you
Cuz I rapped on your door and I said "guess who" (scratch   chh-chh-chh-chh-chh)

My name is Hooch
And I'm misundastood
I rap better than Snoop
Ever thought I could
And I'm badder
Than that dog em n em
If ya listen to my raps then you'll know where I've been (turntable  scratchchh-chh-chh-chh-chh)

Hooch-------yaehHooch-------yeah Hooch
Howlin at the back door
Yes I'm gonna get more
Hooch----yeah Hooch   yeah   Hooch  (turntable scratch-chh-chh-chh-chh-chh0 fadeout......

 

                    AS     I     FEEL

                                  

I don't want to write
Because then I think
Because then I feel
And I cannot afford to

But my journal draws me in
To open it up
And let my thoughts
Fill the pages

But not only words
Cover the page
Also tears
As I FEEL

It may as well be blood
Dripping large drops
Making a mess
Just like my life

My words are my blood
Covering the page
As I bleed out
I cover the page
Leaving just
A scar



                                                                             PAM STEVENS

HANG ON DEAR SISTER

                           HANG   ON,  DEAR  SISTER

Oh,   Sister,
We have shared much...
Laughter and joy
Work and play
Sadness and tears.
We have lifted each other up
And dusted each other off
And encouraged each other
To go on.
We have learned from each other
And supported one another
And helped each other turn weaknesses
Into strengths.

And now, dear Sister
You are far away from us
And from across the miles
We get the news that you are struggling.
And because you are suffering
We also suffer.
But more than that...
We unite
And in your behalf...
We pray.

Hang on dear Sister,
Know that we are uniting
To strengthen the thread
That you hold onto
And remember, dear Sister,
That is our Savior
Who looks down upon us
With love and compassion
As he holds the other end
Of the thread.
And from His throne above
He smiles at us...
As we reach out to you.

Know that we love you,
Dear Sister,
But more than that...
Know that He does...
And hang on.

                                              HUGS AND LOVE   PAM STEVENS  1993

Hope Through Christ

                               Hope     Through  Christ

To struggle over conflicts

Is quite common among men

We barely solve a problem

Another comes again

 

We try to keep our heads up

When our world is crumbling down

And to put a happy face on

That is, when others are around

 

As we get hit by lifes trials

And our heads are hanging low

Lets remember what He did for us

Thats when our faith will grow

 

Remember what He went through

Being spit upon and scorned

He had to drag that heavy cross

And wear that crown of thorns

 

So when we think we've had enough

And suffered way too long

Re-read the story of His life

You'll find out you are wrong

 

There is one whose been through worse

Way worse than our afflictions

Ask His advice on how to cope

He'll tell you true predictions

 

He's seen it all, He's done it all

He's felt pain of betrayal

And after all thats done to Him

He still says He is grateful

 

Grateful, thankful, humbled

To help the roughest ones among you

And even say of enemys

"They know not what they do"

 

And after all the love He shared

The parables he taught

The people didn't realize

It was their blood He bought

 

Re-read the bible stories,

You'll find examples and advice

The trials you suffer lately

Will be made easier in Christ

 

 

•  PAM STEVENS  3/8/11

• 

" The Dangers Of Isolation"

                                       The  Dangers  Of Isolation

   Remember the nature films and documentaries such as "The Wild Kingdom" or"The National Geographic Show "? In these shows, life was presented in its most simple, pure, and raw form. It was honest,emotional,sometimes shocking, but always a truthful portrayal of survival of the fittist in the wild.In these documentaries herds of zebras are seen running together across the plains towards a water source or to safety. There always seems to be a couple of slower animals who can't seem to be able to keep up with the herd. There are always those who, because they are struggling to keep up, tire more quiclky, who lag behind and who eventually stray.
   Off in the distance a lion is crouched down, watching for the stragglers.He watches intently those zebras who fall behind the rest of the herd, the ones who get too far behind and isolate themselves from the herd. They may be slower, weaker,or they may not be paying close attention. They may have gotten confused or may even willfully strayed to follow whatever has piqued their own interest.It may be intentional, or it may not be ,but the stragglers quickly get the full attention of the lion. The lion, who is ever present,intensly aware of the ones who have strayed,watches for the stragglers, the weaker ones,the isolated ones. They become his prey, his target.Those are the ones he marks first for attack because they are easier prey.
   Liken that scenario to Satan,ever present around us...watching,waiting and observing those who isolate themselves from the safety of being with others.Isolation makes one vulnerable. If we are isolating ourselves intentionaly, we are falling right into Satans trap. We are making ourselves easier prey. He is lying in wait,close by, ready to excercise his influence on an isolated soul.If we do not have the safety net around us of being in the presence of the saints, then we have become vulnerable,easier prey to Satan.We are weaker, we are lagging,we are falling behind and are in danger.When we are not actively in the company and security of the saints then Satan has a better chance of influencing us. He is ever present,watching and waiting for his opportunity to pounce.That is his whole purpose.
     If we are inactive,no longer committed or straying, then we are fitting right into his plan. We have made ourselves easy targets for him. Isolation is dangerous for us and Satan is closely watching.Just like in the documentaries of animals in the wild, we must take an honest look at our own actions,decisions and committments for they will prove to be our own spiritual survival. We must be willing to confront the raw, disturbing emotional truth that Satan is indeed ever present around us, lying in wait. Isolation is one of the strongest strategys he can use to lure us to him if we are not careful.Survival is not only fittest of the fastest,it is fittest of the smartest.
.
                                                                                              Pam Stevens    2010